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The Birds, Bees & Bots: Kids’ internet use puts pressure on 70% of parents to have “the talk” sooner than planned


AVG Technologies, a global leader in digital security products, has today released new findings that shows more than half of parents globally are facing mounting pressures to have important conversations with children about sex and relationships – and sooner than the current compulsory age that it is taught at schools (11 years old). 

 

As part of a global research study, AVG found that an overwhelming 70% of parents agreed that the internet has accelerated conversations with children about sex. The company found that 88% of parents cite unintentional exposure to adult material as one of their biggest concerns about their child using the internet. 7 out of 10 (71%) children who admitted to having bad online experiences during lockdown say they were exposed to offensive, rude and adult content. 

 

More than half of parents in the UK (54%) have had conversations with their children about sex by the time their child was 10 years old or younger. At the same time, only a third of parents (33%) said that they had planned to have this conversation with their child at this age.  

 

Additional worries arising from increased usage of the internet included 72% who worry about their children visiting unsuitable websites without their permission, and 48% of parents say they often worry about their child seeing adult content online. 41% say that their main concern about their children using the internet is that they will be exposed to, or take part in, sexting. 

 

Sue Atkins, UK Parenting Coach and Expert, said: “It’s clear that more time spent inside and online is increasing the rate at which children are exposed to inappropriate and adult material. Though, from AVG’s findings, its positive to understand that parents are having frank and open conversations with their children about sex and relationships at the same time."

 

"When approaching conversations with children, it’s important to firstly start by understanding what they know already. Give your children the facts, and correct any misinformation they may have encountered there and then. If a child is exposed to adult content online, and this raises questions, it’s truly helpful for parents to be prepared and relaxed when they have these important conversations with their children, and to feel confident answering their questions honestly and openly.”

 

Peter Turner, Chief Commercial Officer at AVG, said: “As a parent myself, I worry about the type of content children may inadvertently come across while using the internet. Technological solutions from AVG and other companies can help parents but this is only half the solution. Parents still need to talk to their children about the birds, bees and bots! The good news is we know from our research that parents are having open and positive discussions with their children at a time when we are all spending much more time online.”

 

Despite these concerns and pressures to have conversations about sex and relationships sooner than planned, the company has found that parents across the country are taking due diligence to ensure their children are kept safe and secure, and to educate them about what is - and what isn’t - appropriate for them to see and do online. 

 

50% of parents have had conversations with their child about what is classed as good and bad behaviour online. 44% of parents work with their children to agree what is safe to do online e.g. websites to visit, apps they are allowed to use. 

 

Beyond having frank and open conversations with their children, parents are also taking additional measures to protect their children. 34% of parents ensure they set parental controls on every device they use, 38% of parents regularly track their child’s search history, and 28% only allow online usage in communal areas of the home, such as the kitchen or living room.

 

Tips for parents facing “the talk” with their children:

 

  • Talking with kids about sex and relationships is a lifelong conversation
  • Doing a little bit at a time instead of having “the talk” takes pressure off you, and helps your child process your values and information over time. Having regular conversations also sends the message that these topics are important enough to keep bringing up and are a normal part of life.
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  • Create a safe space for conversation
  • It’s important for your child to feel OK about coming to you for reliable, honest information. So, be truthful, relaxed, and confident.
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  • Explain things at a level your child can understand, and make sure your child has the facts.

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  • Don’t jump to conclusions about why they’re asking what they’re asking
  • You can say: “Tell me what you already know about that?”

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  • Keep your answers short and simple and after giving an answer, keep the conversation open. You can say: “What other questions do you have?”

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  • Check their understanding and ask, “Does that answer your question?”